grandma shit on top of the toilet
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
