So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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