Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
why didn't you poke me back
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
