this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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