Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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