I wannas sexs uuuuu
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Randomize
