I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
