How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Found your dick twin last night
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I got inside last night via doggy door
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize