the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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