We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
handjob tips. give me some.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize