bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
