and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Randomize
