Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
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