honey bunches of taint.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
He did a backflip because drugs
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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