his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
