she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
