It's like a parade of train wrecks.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize