I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
