That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
