Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
pray to the hookup gods
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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