Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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