Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
