If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
