ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
