i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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