Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
We're too hungover to prance.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
