My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
