we're blogging at a bar
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Randomize
