i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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