Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
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