it was like eating out sand paper
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
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