and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
