No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
