I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
no you cant smoke seaweed
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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