I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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