also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
