i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize