Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
