How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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