one might say we're banned from that church
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
there was a trapeze. enough said
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
