she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
it was like eating out sand paper
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
