Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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