i think i recognize dicks better than faces
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
