just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize