I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
