"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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