If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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