This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Randomize
