Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Too much gin, very little bucket
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
