we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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